Thursday, June 29, 2006


as long as everyone's talking about soccer...

(modified from an email)

last night i accepted stephanie's invitation to utilize sam and doug's ginormous tV and tivo to watch the brazil-ghana world cup game. really, though, i actually did not expect to be as engaged in the game viewing as i ended up being. the huge-ass tV was undoubtedly helpful, but i had fully misplaced and forgotten how much i can enjoy watching that sport played in front of me... i would say that i generally abhor watching televised sporting events, and i won't watch much live sports, either. but watching good soccer, for me, is akin to how some folks seem to feel when they watch, say, ballet. beautiful, beautiful... and i think i figured out one other factor that adds to my enjoyment: i can and do empathize quite tightly with the people on the screen in most situations. when someone makes a break and gets up to a one-on-one with the keeper, i remember exactly how that feels.

i played my first league game in 2.5 years on monday. (and i did, of course, injure myself. my ankle is still the size of a tennis ball.) totally coincidental that it's during cup season--sam and stephanie have been forwarding team possibilities to me for a couple of months, and this one worked. i played from age 7 on in rec leagues for outdoor, futsal (i miss futsal!!), and indoor; played both intermurals and pE in college just about every quarter til my last; then stopped when i realized that my headaches were being dramatically exacerbated by the activity. i miss it terribly, but it's going to be hard to find a situation that really works for me. i've played the game forEVER, but i'm not very skilled at all and i'm, you know, female, so i need either a moderately good women's team or a coed team that likes my personality a lot :P

p.s. futsal, btw, is described well on this site, including the following summary:

Futsal is FIFA's official indoor soccer game which is, essentially, a scaled down version of outdoor soccer played indoors. It is a small sided game (5v5) played on a smaller field (roughly basketball court sized) with a smaller (size 3-4) ball. Futsal is played with touchline boundaries. There are no walls in play. This is the game that outdoor soccer players around the globe play when they are indoors to refine and maintain their control skills and touch. It is superior to walled soccer in terms of developing better skills and technique. In traditional American walled soccer, players regularly whack the ball (and sometimes their bodies) against the boards which promotes improper technique and too often rewards errant play. In Futsal, players are constantly reminded to play the same quality control game that is required for success in the outdoor game.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006


see? you really SHOULD over-analyze these things.

right--i tightened up the post so that the whole article isn't here anymore. but it's still SO GOOD!! brilliant, even. or at least proof positive that someone has the same film parts of his brain as i do. read it.

pS. i cut a part of the text where he mentioned garden state. but just fyi, he mentioned garden state. and he approves.

ppS. off the top of my head, my third-date flick short list would include yellow submarine, high fidelity, the royal tenenbaums, anything by almodovar, and arrested development 1st season. i have strict rules not to subject a male-type person to jane austen until we've been dating for at least 4 months. and while i realize that my choice of almodovar makes me suspect, i strongly endorse--with feeling--the statements regarding lynch et al.

Pajiba's Guide to Third-Date Flicks
by dustin rowles

Never underestimate the importance of third dates, folks. Third dates are where long-term determinations are made, where a relationship crystallizes, where you find out if the guy with perfectly mussed hair and a slobber-free kissing ability actually has something under the hood. While first dates test physical attraction, and second dates allow you, in varying degrees, to act upon that attraction, it is the third date where actual personalities are revealed. While first and second dates generally take place in public — restaurants, bars, movie theaters, or (for the luckier) park benches after last call — third dates tend to take shape on living-room couches, accompanied by light spirits, take-out, and DVDs.

Indeed, in many relationships, the figurative “third date” is where each partner presents his or her defining movie, the one film that epitomizes your personality — the piece of pop culture you put out there to reveal your essence, man. Back in the ’60s and ’70s, I suspect these dates took place in front of a record player, where songs were traded back and forth and couples quickly learned that Bob Dylan and Donna Summer could not co-exist. Today, in a technological world replete with rewind, pause, and DVD bonus features, it is the couch (or futon) where these defining moments are made, and where Bruckheimer can ruin a relationship or Alexander Payne can make it.

This is why, in our first “Pajiba’s Guide to What’s Good for You,” column, I offer you a handy-dandy guide to third-date movies, and what they mean to the future of your relationships.

The Rain on My Car is a Baptism, the New Me, Ice Man, Power Lloyd, My Assault on the World Begins Now: A guy can almost never go wrong with pre-2001 John Cusack — Say Anything or High Fidelity says sensitive yet masculine, culturally aware yet unpretentious, and Fidelity’s credit-rolling Stevie Wonder number, “I Believe (When I Fall in Love It Will Be Forever)” provides the ideal segue from love seat to fold-out couch. Grosse Pointe Blanke also offers a subversive twist to the Cusack canon, suggesting all of the above, but with some added baggage: He’s cool, musically inclined, but his relationships inexplicably fall apart under the weight of his past. If he offers you Shakabuku, however, politely decline and make your excuses.
I am the Muffin: If either partner sticks in Truffaut, David Lynch, Von Trier, Bertolucci, Malick or anyone else of their ilk, they’re already trying too hard to impress — if he/she is actually an intellectual heavyweight, there is no need to bother with Le Crime de Monsieur Lange unless he/she is out to prove something or he/she is an asshole movie critic (or film student) and, trust me, you don’t want to go there. Roman Polanski, Jean-Luc Goddard, foreign films, and documentaries might suggest a high level of intelligence, but they’re not good third-date choices unless you’re trying to scare away your Ashton Kutcher types or sleep with one of your grad students, who feign interest to procure an A in your class. Don’t get me wrong: There is something to be said for a cerebral mate, but anyone who discusses auteur theories on a third date probably doesn’t wash his or her hair very often and will likely end up trying to talk you into an “open relationship” at some point. If that’s your bag, more power to you.
Now that I’ve Met You, Would You Object to Never Seeing Me Again?: Anything written or directed by Wes Anderson, Spike Jonze, David O. Russell, Paul Thomas Anderson, or Charlie Kaufman are risky propositions, with equal powers to alienate or ingratiate. Indeed, I would suggest that all of the above filmmakers provide an easy means to screen out potential mates. If you pop in Magnolia and your date is still curled up next to you after frogs have fallen from the sky, you’ve found your soul mate. If, however, your date fell asleep halfway through The Royal Tenenbaums, I’d suggest gnawing off your arm and making for the door before he/she wakes up hoping to watch a Tim Allen or Brittany Murphy flick.
I’m Sorry, but I Take Little Pleasure in a Ball: If, on a third date, your girlfriend pulls out anything from Merchant Ivory Productions (Howard’s End, The Remains of the Day), anything adapted from a Jane Austen novel, or almost any movie starring Colin Firth, there is probably nothing wrong with her. She’s smart, independent, and literate. In fact, if she’s hot enough, spare her feelings and try to stay awake for God’s sake. If, on the other hand, you’re a guy who actually finds yourself enjoying any of the aforementioned films, you might consider reexamining your heterosexuality and think twice before popping in The Blue Lagoon.
I am a Golden God! Since you’ve indulged me so far, allow me to introduce my personal recommendation. First off, if you’re me, and she shows up with Harold and Maude, you’re probably going to end up happily married someday, but you’re going to have to endure a whole helluva lot of Cat Stevens before the man calls you upstairs to tend to the clouds. And while I might counter with one of the Cusack flicks above, if I see true long-term viability to the relationship, there is no better third-date film than Almost Famous. It’s got it all, y’all. It’s a slightly tipsy, 2 a.m.-phone-call kind of movie that introduces the best musical moment in cinematic history, the “Tiny Dancer” bus scene that will buckle your knees, make the hair on your arms salute the gods, and then detonate inside you. Indeed, Almost Famous is the closest you can get to swapping LPs on the tabletop, presenting “River,” “America,” “Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters,” “The Wind,” Alvin and the Chipmunks for novelty value, a Skynyrd song that’ll make you forget all about “Freebird,” and a Nancy Wilson score that strikes just the right chord to break your heart. Almost Famous harkens back to a time when music offered salvation instead of an insipid avenue to that faux-hipster vibe and, if you can’t find some sort of romantic symbiosis when Phillip Seymour Hoffmann pronounces that “The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone when you’re uncool,” then you don’t belong together. Hell, you may as well go back to watching There’s Something About Mary with your roommate and discussing the secrets to crushing Schlitz cans into your forehead, because that’s where you’re going to be until you find a woman that not only loves Miss Congeniality but has an unironic fondness for Weekend at Bernie’s.


concerning the effects of glitch on my hormones:

i was heretofore unaware of the strength of my preferences, but when i walked into nickie's the other day and saw three boyze standing over laptops, bobbing their heads in time with the bass as they stared intently at their screens, i just about moaned out loud. far and away one of the hottest scenes i've beheld in months.


how NOT to steal; how TO create change

have you seen this yet?
if not, it's pretty interesting.

been following the site and story for a couple weeks now, but what prompted me to post was this posting by evan:

I also got an email from a person who seemed rather upset at me. He asked me why I would waste everyones time with this Sidekick story instead of focusing on people being killed all over the world. And he's right... Kind of... I am writing about what I know. I have no knowledge of writing about someone else's life. Instead of being upset at me, this person should go start a blog of his own... and get the word out.. And hopefully people will listen... But to me mad at me about writing about what I know...just seems silly.

maybe it's a stretch, but i was in arguments with folks last month about the activism regarding the ocean beach fire policy... the gist: is local and narrowly focused activism about small or banal issues lame and not worth either pursuing or supporting? my hearty and strongly worded response is NO!!!

more when i have time--i've been meaning to write about this for weeks and weeks.

Saturday, June 24, 2006



i am proud to be a freek.
i am proud to be living on the fringes of normal.
i am proud to be queer of center.
i am proud that i see beauty in unlikely places, have interest in the unusual people i encounter, take delight in lives that push boundaries.
i am proud of my counterculture and the countercultures that i see elsewhere, creating community and holding space for new paradigms of society.
i am proud to live in a city that celebrates diversity and encourages radical behavior.

i am proud to the point of bursting, walking down the streets of san francisco on this weekend of celebration, looking around at the faces of the people around me.

Friday, June 23, 2006


anti-suicide bombing PSA

magellan posted an article from newsweek that opened with the following intro paragraph:

"Remember the egg, the frying pan and the message? "This is your brain," the ominous narrator told us before cracking an egg over the sizzling skillet. "This is your brain on drugs." Public service announcements have changed a lot since that foreboding culinary lesson. They now include exploding cars, flying Matrix-style stuntmen and exceedingly dire messages like "Don't Suicide Bomb." A new, American-made PSA aimed at discouraging these deadly attacks is currently in production. The ad is slated to air as a 60-second spot on Iraqi television this summer."

so just by itself that's a mock-worthy piece of news, and a bit ridiculous. but my comment was that the ludicrous and completely futile nature of this effort is the sort of thing that makes you start laughing until you reach hysteria and then end up in gut-wrenching sobs, collapsed into someone's lap, for no less than 45 minutes. and because this may or may not be something i've been having problems with lately, i thought i'd pull it into type. because the ease with which i descend into hysterical depressed freak-outs over world affairs is, in itself, starting to freak me out, and i wouldn't mind having a witness or two.

p.s. the dumbasses involved in this little plan for heroically convincing iraq's troubled youth to selflessly devote themselves to life apparently never saw 'heathers'. or if they did, they totally didn't fucking get it.


my five-year anniversary

as of this weekend, i have officially been rockin it through my life in full solo mode for FIVE WHOLE YEARS.

happy anniversary to me!!! and may my contentment with my independence and excitement about my opportunities stay as strong as it's been for the last two years.

i am happy;
i am strong;
i am fortunate; and
i am grateful.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006



there's this nice little chain going around tribe right now, and i enjoyed reading other people's posts and writing my own very much. reposting here. AND i'm going to tag a couple new people for their blogs (or email, i guess), which they will only know about if they actually read this, which is interesting mostly because i actually am not sure at all who looks at this page. i tag magellan, judit, joshua, melvin, vera, and cori jo.

RULES - Once you've been tagged, you have to write a blog with 8 facts/things/habits about yourself, saying who tagged you. In the end you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. No tag backs.

1. from the age of 6 until the age of 16 i was a member of the santa rosa children's chorus, a prestigious professional children's chorus, non-denominational, that takes itself very seriously and does lots of performances all over the place. with them i competed in a few festivals and competitions; i sang at disneyland; i sang in a ballet; i could've sung at a baseball game; and i performed in probably over 60 venues in northern california.

2. from the age of 6 until the age of 16 i also played piano. competitively, though i never won much. i took all the tests and passed through the highest testable level in california. i hated performing and i hated practicing, but i was determined to know how to create music. even though i had rigorous classical training, i sucked at accompanying and at jazz piano, so within a couple years after stopping my lessons i stopped playing pretty much entirely. i can still read music quite easily on sight, and i miss piano quite a bit sometimes, but i don't regret ending my studies--an hour per day is a long time to spend at a piano bench.

3. i'm about 75% deaf in my left ear. i've been that way since birth, as far as my parents know. they don't know why.

4. for two different years during my time in davis, i lived in an intentional community called the domes. the domes is an on-campus housing cooperative consisting of 14 domes arranged around a central greenspace, with chicken coops, large organic gardens, a strawbale greenhouse, a fire-heated hot tub, a bike maintenance area, and a consensus-based decision-making process about all of everything that happens in the community. each dome has a floorplan with a diameter of maybe 22 feet, is about 20 feet high in the center, and contains a bathroom, kitchen, and a lofted area.

5. up until my headaches made it too difficult for me to continue, my favorite thing to do in the whole world (with no exceptions) was playing soccer. indoor, outdoor, futsol...didn't matter. just as long as there was a soccer ball involved.

6. when my uncle switched to dVds, i was given his entire laserdisc collection. i now have at my house roughly 350 laserdiscs and 2 laserdisc players.

7. i have been on three week-long cruises with my extended family—one in the caribbean, one in alaska, one in the mediterranean.

8. the only two groups that i've seen play more than 3 or so times are the mother hips (26 times) and punch the clown (probably 7-8 times). (neil young totally doesn't count, because i would never have chosen to see him every fall—it just happened that way.)

Friday, June 09, 2006


rapture ready (or eschatology, 'a big word to impress your friends')

got linked to this meticulously calculated rapture index this morning. it is rather a fascinating subject, don't you think? eschatology is the study of things that relate to the end times. i do think it would be interesting to study things that relate to the end times. and it would, of course, be interesting to witness this event. i mean, i wouldn't be stoked at the knowledge that i only had 7 years left to live, or what have you (21 years? i forget), but if you're wanting a chance to live through history, man, that'd be it.

i think i mentioned below that i purchased the first of the 'left behind' books, yes? so i read it. i wasn't overly taken with the writing style, for sure (although it wasn't as bad as i thought it would be), but it was interesting to read an interpretation of apocalypse as it would actually play out in modern society. i'm totally interested in reading more of the series, but it wasn't THAT readable and it's reeeeally long.

by way of an explanation and excuse--you do realize that these books are kept in the science fiction/fantasy section of your local bookstore, right? so maybe that's the root of my fascination--if any science fiction scenario is going to play out, wouldn't you bet on a prophesied one?

Thursday, June 08, 2006


fugged up

so amy totally destroyed me when she referenced go fug yourself a few weeks ago. i have a hard time admitting this, but omg i just CAN'T STOP CHECKING THAT SITE. to the point that i go browse the archives, even. yeah. i know. i mean, i don't even know who the women ARE that they make fun of, most of the time. (or at least i didn't used to...shit shit shit.)

anyways, i kind of assumed that maybe they wouldn't be totally all overwhelmed with joy at the site of my outfits all the time, but i was mostly just basing that off of the fact that i totally like a couple of the outfits that they can't stand. i didn't really have proof that they would hate me...

until now.

monochromatic sparkly over-accessorized layer girl?
i have no idea what you're talking about.

Wednesday, June 07, 2006


K O D O M A fashion show

last thursday i modelled clothes in the kodoma show at madrone. there were five designers--

bad unkl sista,
miranda caroligne,
miss velvet cream,
sandy reyes, and

make-up by guille and hair by brian, with assistance from anna.

i had a fantastic time getting all done up and dancing about with the other models (lady.leblanc, tamara ja, dre, ms. fine, and sequoia emmanuelle), uv corz. absolutely fabulous.

i'm not sure if there was a court-ordered photographer, but there were so many cameras out that i hope we manage to wrangle up a bunch of sets. and here's the first:

thanks jay!

i had a hard time figuring out which one i was in most of the pictures i was in, so i don't really expect you to know either, but at any rate the pictures give a sense of the make-up and outfits.

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